Light and Sound

I know I just posted about Rocky Votolato but I just can’t help but see the messages in his Suicide Medicine album. I’d like to know if other people see a spiritual message in this song as well.

Are you gonna die with that music inside
Did you catch the twilight on your way into work
You can live anything you can think
Man I’m not lying to you and yeah that’s a threat
I don’t want to have to bury you like this
Something’s gotta get your attention
If I have to crack open your skull with my fist
I’ll let the light and the sound escape

Listen now
You can hear the sound
Surrender and let the light come out
Don’t be afraid
Let me hear your voice
What you will live is what you make

I know you’ve worked hard your whole life
And now your tired the money is never enough
It’s never gonna be enough man that’s not even the point
The only thing you can’t afford is to keep buying the lines your fed
I know it’s comfortable to go back to sleep
Take a look at what you’ve been lying in
Before you wake up in search of your paycheck death
The demons of regret are making your deathbed

Listen now
You can hear the sound
Surrender and let the light come out
Don’t be afraid
Let me hear your voice
What you will live is what you make
Don’t be afraid
Let me hear your voice
Let the light come out
Cause I’m ready now
Like I never was before
To see what this is all about

I know, now that I look at it, it wasn’t really the intent of the song to have the meaning it does to me, but still… I like it and I wonder, especially concidering my last post.

 

When my faith is strong I know my strength

I left church today and Rocky Votolato’s Suicide Medicine was in my cd player. I love this album and have probably listened to it the most out of any other. Alabaster was playing and I couldn’t believe what I had missed before. I wish I knew more about this song. It has many, many blatent biblical reference but I’m not entirely sure on the heart behind it. Here are the lyrics:

On the outside looking in
i’ve never been able to crack the code
to break the secret spell
that would open up the door and let me in
to everything I’ve been looking for so hard I’ve never seen
but I feel my strength returning tonight
its flowing from the purest well to ever give water
out into an ocean where the sharks are circling
a carnival of counterfeits has no room for something real
arrogance and ego wrapped around every word
shouted from the pulpit as a judgment to control
these were my roots my seed was thrown in shallow soil
I grew into the thorn bushes to be scorched by the sun
but I feel the gravel move beneath my feet
the smell of the gasoline mixed in with the trees
when my faith is strong I know my strength
the threats will be screamed when the vultures fell threatened
so I’ll open up the door and let you in
I want to break the alabaster smell the sweet perfume
and when the bottle is broken I’ll have nothing left to give
I’ll know I’ll already have everything worth having
but I feel my strength returning tonight
its flowing from the purest well to ever give water
out into and ocean where the sharks are circling
a carnival of counterfeits want to crucify something real

The references:

The door -

Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.

-Revelation 3:20

Purest well -

but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.

- John 4:14 (to note, this is Jesus speaking to the woman at the well)

Seed in shallow soil and thorns -

⁵Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants.

-Matthew 13:5-7

Perfume -

While Jesus was in Bethany in the home of a man known as Simon the Leper, a woman came to him with an alabaster jar of very expensive perfume, which she poured on his head as he was reclining at the table.

When the disciples saw this, they were indignant. “Why this waste?” they asked. ‘This perfume could have been sold at a high price and the money given to the poor.”

Aware of this, Jesus said to them, “Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me. The poor you will always have with you, but you will not always have me. When she poured this perfume on my body, she did it to prepare me for burial. I tell you the truth, wherever this gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her.”

- Matthew 26:6-14

I am not sure of the meaning behind this song but there are definately some stand out messages. It is just so cool, I had to blog about it!

This is five years old but its all I got, so you can hear the song.

 

My Job

I haven’t said anything about my job in awhile, which if you look at my old blog you will see a lot of Starbucks news especially about a year ago. I bring it up now because of a recent employ being fired from the company. Starbucks was her life, she knew it, and I could understand because Starbucks was my life for a long time. When you don’t have anything else you can truly enjoy or excel at you learn to love your job. I think her “let go” had just reason and maybe it wasn’t handled in the right way, I’m not sure, I don’t know all the details but I do know that we were all shocked by the suddenness of it.

What I am really trying to say is about her reaction. I get a “boycott Starbucks” invitation on Facebook. I read over the page and I totally understand, everything she says is true. The company talks about taking care of their employs and create a positive work environment and blah blah blah… Starbucks is wasteful and half the employs don’t care about the quality which the company claims. These are all things that drive me crazy as well. Then I just go through every other company in my head… This fallen world. People continue to strive and demand perfection that they will never have in this setting. Corruption is everywhere. This can be looked at as a downer or a pessimistic attitude but I see it as a wake up call. A wake up call to looking in the wrong places. Boycotting something is threatening to take away jobs, jobs from people like me and my co-workers and the people who spend time in an office. It is not as though everyone has hypocritical desires in the company, we are just trying to make a little money that is necessary to live. I just think of how many jobs Starbucks is providing, including health insurance, and I am pleased.

We don’t have control of the situations around us, we only have control over ourselves and stop trying to find peace in this world. Peace of this world is artificial…. True peace, peace that comes from God, is internal and shines through even in the trenches of war.

 

Create Your Own Album

This is fun.

Make your own album cover complete with band name, album title and cover art selected for you at random. Just follow these simple instructions:

1_ Go to Wikipedia. Select “random” [or click http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random ] The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2_ Go to Quotations Page. Select “random quotations” [or click http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3 ] The last four — five words of the very last quote on the page is the title of your first album.

3_ Go to Flickr. Select “explore the last seven days” [or click http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days ] The Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

Here’s what I got…

 

Oh My Soul

I just hate going so long without a new post.

I don’t really have anything picked out to write about.

I was talking to a good friend last night, some of what we talked about got me thinking about self-improvement. The self-help section in Barnes and Noble makes me gag; when I see 10 ways to… or change made easy or simple steps I want to throw those books to the floor. I’m not saying that there is something wrong with using these books as reference or maybe encouragement but as the “answer” they are missing the mark. It reminds me of time and time again when I get so excited about a project or idea which slowly deflates. I’m trailing off though…. The point I’m trying to make is that the self-improvement we were talking about is real.

My sister the other day was talking about our father, ranting I guess I should say about his lack of urgency when it comes to getting things done. She just wanted it to change. My mom and I replied with sarcastic comments on how great the world would be if we could change what was wrong with us.

We tend to get so upset with ourselves and with others for our faults, our weaknesses. Recognize that we have them. Recognize that self-improvement is knowing what is wrong and not just taking steps to improvement but picking yourself up again when you fail. It is like sin, the point for us is not to strive for perfection but to know God is the only one who can help us through. He is the only example to live by. I’m trailing again, I apologize for the lack of organized thought.

Grace is huge. See it! Grace is huge! Where would we be without grace? See it in what God does. Share it with others, including yourself.

I cannot say the rest on my own…

¹Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. ²As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God. ³For you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do—living in debauchery, lust, drunkenness, orgies, carousing and detestable idolatry. ⁴They think it strange that you do not plunge with them into the same flood of dissipation, and they heap abuse on you. ⁵But they will have to give account to him who is ready to judge the living and the dead. ⁶For this is the reason the gospel was preached even to those who are now dead, so that they might be judged according to men in regard to the body, but live according to God in regard to the spirit.

⁷The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray. ⁸Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. ⁹Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. ¹⁰Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms. ¹¹If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.

¹²Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. ¹³But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. ¹⁴If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you. ¹⁵If you suffer, it should not be as a murderer or thief or any other kind of criminal, or even as a meddler. ¹⁶However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name. ¹⁷For it is time for judgment to begin with the family of God; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God? ¹⁸And, “If it is hard for the righteous to be saved, what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?”

1 Peter 4

Live according to the spirit.

Pray.

Love one another.

 

Ultimate Foreshadowing

Wow.

I could go on for a long time about this verse.

Then one of them, named Caiaphas, who was high priest that year, spoke up, “You know nothing at all! You do not realize that it is better for you that one man die for the people than that the whole nation perish.”

He did not say this on his own, but as high priest that year he prophesied that Jesus would die for the Jewish nation, and not only for that nation but also for the scattered children of God, to bring them together and make them one.

John 11:49-52

This was part of the conversation which led to the plotting of Jesus’s death. Caiaphas, the high priest of the time, a man who directly accused Jesus of blasphemy, couldn’t even fathom the truth in his words. The purpose in the statement for Caiaphas was that by killing Jesus they could protect the nation from the Romans. God’s purpose of the purpose was the prophese.

This got me to thinking about how God uses everyone and has lain everything out for His will. Jesus’s death, though He did not deserve it, was for the salvation of the world… The death of one man can save all…

The beginning of John 11 depicts the story of Jesus bring Lazarus back from the dead. This is what led to the Pharisees meeting which led the plotting of Jesus’s death. Lazarus died so Jesus could raise him from the dead, so that Jesus would die and God would raise Him from the dead, making it possible that we can all be raised from the dead.

For now I am going to call this utlimate foreshadowing… now let me sit in awe.

 

Heath Ledger: He’s Not Here

A year ago today, talented actor Heath Ledger was found dead in a hotel room. People automatically pointed the suicide finger and the rest is history… The reaons I bring this up (not that he was my favorite actor) but the article in Entertainment Weekly and the movie I’m Not There. Everything just seemed to happen at once: I recieved I’m Not There in my Netflix and the new Entertainment Weekly in the mail yesterday. The article was amazing, I recomend it for anyone interested in Ledger’s career and death, it was all stories from people close to him. The article confirmed that Ledger did not die of a drug overdose but just combined the wrong priscription drugs. I always maintained the theory that the role of The Joker overtook Ledger; he let something in that he couldn’t get out and thus couldn’t sleep at night. The aritcle said his pain came from his seperation from Michelle Williams and the time he had away from his daughter. It ended saying simply that he died from a broken heart.

I put down the article and decide to spend the rest of my night watching I’m Not There. I was a fairly good film, lots of a very good acting but a hard plot to follow. Heath Ledger’s role struck me. He was protrayed as the actor taken over by his fame and thus forever damaging his relationship with his wife. I got to thinking about how maybe it was this role which got into his mind. I really can’t say more on the subject except to watch the film.

 

Mending

I sit back and wonder why it is that I am so impatient. When I allow God to work in His time He doesn’t fail me. How many times do I have to beat it into my head that God has His own perfect, beautiful timing.

I title this post “mending” because I was given the opportunity to mend a relationship. Yes, it was one that has lost meaning to me but that it was brought up again it means so much… I wish I could go into more detail but it really has given me hope for the future and God’s timing.

There are friendships and relationships that I look forward to seeing recovered, mended and almsot ended properly. I must believe that in my waiting God will provide the perfect timing for these things to happen.

I just need patience, honesty and kindess….

 

Of Mondays and Of Psalms

I have found myself in wonderfully strange places. Every Monday night I am at some random place in and around Denver with a varying group of people most of which I’ve just met. I am getting to know these people more yes, by talking about Psalm. The simplicity of it all I am sweetly drinking; God is teaching me so much through these Monday night conversations.

• About people being your enemies until you know their story.
• How we should not seek sinlessness but grace, God’s most wonderful gift.
• That God can save us from more hurt by not answering our prayers.
• Acts 14:16-18 (Read it and think about our country)
• The power in testimony…. Psalm 66…. Which brings me back to the top of my list.

God can lead me places I can’t even imagine, I just have to remind myself to be willing.

 

I’m not sorry I met you, I’m not sorry it’s over, I’m not sorry there’s nothing to say.

A new year.

I realize I tend to look back before looking forward, almost as if to say “See what has happened, see what has passed?” and then I say, “What could I possibly imagine for the future?”

What can I possibly imagine for the future? The changes in my life even over the past three years have been immeasurable. I have experienced loneliness, God’s unrequited grace, the importance in friendship even in a few, seeing what God is capable of but still allowing it to not be grasped. I feel a build-up in my heart, how can I express what has happened, what I’ve face, what I’ve learned? My heart sags in my chest at the weight. The emotional, romantic side in me wants to revisit those places and people who have made such a difference, who God has used so beautifully and say all the things it has meant. If I’ve had the opportunities the messages have been missed, so in the end there really is nothing to say.